100 Funny Christmas Card Messages [Not TOO Naughty] » All Gifts Considered

100+ Funny Christmas Wishes, Messages & Greetings During the Christmas season, happiness takes over like the snow in winter. It's a time to celebrate like never before, and what better way to set the mood than with a funny Christmas wish? These humorous Christmas wishes are sure to spread holiday joy and bring smiles to your loved ones. " " Dearest God, this Christmas I planned on going green. So please get the point and send my lots of cash this Christmas. Thank you!" " Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and all your cash suddenly disappears!

Funny Christmas Wishes Best Christmas Greetings

Use it wisely! Santa's list just confirmed what I already knew - I'm getting coal this year for marrying you! Merry Christmas! I've hidden your present where you'll never find it - right where you left your keys. To my loving husband/boyfriend: May your Christmas be as relaxed as you are on weekends. Merry Christmas! Table of Contents Funny Merry Christmas Wishes Here are a few of our favorite funny Christmas wishes. I hope Santa fills our socks with cash instead of gifts and toys. I know you hope for the same. Wishing you a happy Christmas! Christmas is all about spending time with good people. So makes sure you spend the entire day with me tomorrow. 100 Funny Christmas Quotes 1. "I was Christmas shopping and ran into a guy on the street. I noticed his watch and said that it runs slow. He said, 'So does the guy I stole it from.'" — David. Are you short on time? Check out the editor's favorite funny Christmas card messages. For family: "In case I don't see you this Christmas, here are the answers to a few questions I know you would have asked… No. I am still not married, have no boyfriend, and yes I still have that shitty job. Merry Christmas." For friends: "Happy Holidays!

30 Funny Christmas Quotes to Share This Holiday Season Reader's Digest

— Home Alone It's hard to buy you something for Christmas when you got everything you ever wanted when you married me. [ find the card here!] In a world full of Grinches, just be a Griswold. — National Lampoon Why is Christmas just like a day in the office? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit. - Ginjas! (We never get tired of this Christmas holiday joke!) Christmas is Claus for celebration! It's the most wine-derful time of the year. This holiday season let us treasure what is truly important in all our lives, the reason for the season: your Cookies. You know those commercials where the present is a brand new car with a big red bow? Winston Spear "At Christmas, tea is compulsory. Relatives are optional." - Robert Godden This holiday season, no matter what your religion is, please take a moment to reflect on why it's better than all the other ones. Guy Endore Kaiser My mother-in-law has come round to our house at Christmas seven years running. Santa told me you'd been very good this year; I told him it was just a lack of opportunity. Merry Christmas! Christmas is a time for remembering family and trying to guess everyone's sizes! Have a Wonderful Christmas! There are four stages in life: 1) You believe in Santa Claus. 2) You don't believe in Santa Claus. 3) You are Santa Claus.

40 Funny Christmas Card Sayings and Messages Redbubble Life

Funny Christmas wishes and messages 🙂 I hope Santa leaves you plenty of presents, but I hope the reindeer do not leave behind any "presents" on your lawn! Merry Christmas! 🙂 I wish for your holidays to be filled with many big smiles and big celebrations - but hopefully not big credit card bills! 14. "A Christmas miracle is when your family doesn't get into a single argument all day." —Melanie White. 15. "There are a lot of things money can't buy. Not one of them is on my son. 40 Funny Christmas Card Sayings and Messages Ah, the time of year that starts with decking the halls with boughs of holly and quickly devolves to wanting to deck your family members with fists of fury. See you in the poor house! Santa knows you were a bad girl this year, but that's okay… I heard he was looking for another ho. Hope your Christmas is full of candy canes, gingerbread cookies, and spiked eggnog that's strong enough to kill a reindeer. Ah Christmas… the holiday centered around an old man and his big sack.

Funny Christmas Quote With The Grinch Pictures, Photos, and Images for Facebook, Tumblr

41 Funny Christmas Messages To Write In A Card christmas card messages christmas card messages to make you laugh funny christmas funny christmas card messages Christmas is a time filled with laughter, cheer and the creation of memories that will last a lifetime. Merry Christmas, dear. May the calories of Christmas disappear by the New Year. Happy holidays! Remember to smile and enjoy your time. Because when Christmas is over, nobody will care whether you exist or not! Christmas is all about spending time with good people.